Monday, 1 March 2010

Cyprus Blues - A Novel by Maggie Knutson

I intend to publish this novel as an e-book, so read it here while you can.
PART ONE: THE BLUE, BLUE SEA  
PLEASE DO NOT READ CHAPTER ONE !!! IT NEEDS TO BE SERIOUSLY EDITED - AS IT STANDS IT IS WAY TOO LONG AND LONG-WINDED AND I NEED TO EDIT OUT ONE OF THE CHARACTERS - BUT THE REST OF THE NOVEL IS JUST ABOUT GOOD TO GO !
CHAPTER ONE: KATE

Do I ever regret getting on that plane? No. Never. Not even for one moment.

Because if I hadn’t, if I’d stayed in England, then I would never have discovered that life truly begins only when you start to live with intensity, with passion, and with love. And until then, you’re only existing…nothing more…as I was.

And then, when you allow yourself the freedom to be yourself, life becomes so wonderful that you can feel your heart beating with its own beautiful rhythm and you enjoy each new experience with the pleasure of a small child.
But it doesn't last. Of course it doesn't last. Nothing does.

Because just when you feel that life couldn't get any better, it starts to fray around the edges ,whoever you are, and then your heightened senses make you more likely to feel the hurt…the pain…the dismay of it all.

I can say this now, because I survived.

But it is only now, when I look back, that I can see so clearly that life is more like a game of snakes and ladders than anything else. Once you pick up the dice and make your first throw, the only way is up and off you go, shouting and whooping with joy. And when you reach the top of each ladder, you can look down, with great satisfaction, and see how far you have advanced.

And, boy, does the world look good from up there.

But then, on the next throw, you can land at the top of a slippery, slidey snake and swoop back down, often passing places that you had already reached…and it can be devastating.

And then you have several options to choose from. You can dash your dice against the wall and refuse to play…or huddle yourself into a sulk and behave like a spoilt child …or you can get up and start all over again.

Only this time you’re very wary of those snakes.

But snakes and ladders is a board game and no-one dies…not as they do in real life. And your ups and downs are often the result of other people’s choices, not your own. And until you realise and accept that, you’re going to be a very bitter person.

Am I bitter? No, I’m not bitter… because I know the difference between merely existing and living life as fully as I can and I choose the fullness despite all those bloody snakes.

~

For me, my life began in that way, when I knew I was truly alive rather than existing, when I was twenty-two years old. The date was July 21st 1973. Hard to believe it was so long ago, but it is as clear in my mind as if it were yesterday. It still is, every single day since then, because I was living it... really living it.

Link to and read the complete novel here.

No comments: