BREAKING NEWS - maggie's search for a literary agent is over !!!

Don't you just hate it when you're watching the news and suddenly, in bold captions, taking up a quarter of the screen, is BREAKING NEWS and you automatically stop listening and start reading the caption!

Only, the caption is not exactly breaking news standard, which, in my books, is something really awful or absolutely wonderful. It's usually something tedious/boring and by this time you've lost track of the item you were listening to.

I only noticed this practice during T.V. coverage of the invasion of Iraq and so it was pretty important but now stations do it all the time for no apparent reason, it seems to me.

Anyway, I decided to use this technique for myself to announce my status viz-a-viz finding a literary agent. Only it's not what you expect because the fact is that I've made the momentus decision to actually stop looking for an agent.

If one phones me up, begging to take me on, then I might reconsider but until then, I've had enough.

And the reason is very simple.

I read, on a regular basis, two writing magazines: Mslexia and Writing Magazine and they both include interviews with agents and publishing editors and the message is loud and clear from both sources.

What they want in an author is someone who writes in a similiar way or on similiar themes to other writers so they can 'pidgeon-hole' the writing. They also want the writer to churn out a book a year, preferably as part of a series, and that meeting dead-lines is essential.

Sadly to say, I just can't do that. These days I have to pace myself not push myself. So, there's really no point in spending time and money sending off manuscripts to agents when I know that there's no way I can be the performing puppet that they're really looking for.

What I shall do, though, is research the smaller publishing houses, where costs are far less and where I'm hoping that there's less need to sign a two/three/more than three book deal. And if I find anywhere suitable, then I'll send off Cyprus Blues.

Things may be different when I've finished Winchester Blues, which I would class as a modern Agatha Christie who-dunnit, because I do intend to extend that into a series.

So, fingers crossed for a small publishing house...Watch this space...

CHINDIT HOUSE, GLASTONBURY - A FIRST CLASS BED AND BREAKFAST ESTABLISHMENT

Last Saturday, we needed a room for the night in Glastonbury so we could go to Mitzi's (one of John's sisters) birthday party but were having great difficulties in finding anywhere available.

Although Glastonbury is famous for its enormous open-air festival, there's actually a lot going on there all the year round, ranging from the Abbey Extravagenza (Dire Straits played this year) to groups playing in pubs to special spiritual celebration weeks.

So, the week we wanted to go, there was a Tibet week happening and our usual b and b's were full. But eventually, John found us a room at Chindit House, which he found on the web. The only drawback was that it was going to cost £125 for the night for the two of us, which is pricey by Glastonbury standards.

"It'd had better be good!" we muttered to ourselves more than once.

The weather that Saturday was foul - cloudy, cold and wet - so we reckoned that we could use the A303 for most of the way from Winchester, including the potential bottleneck miles before and after StoneHenge.

Big mistake.

Hence, it took much longer than expected and we arrived at Chindit House tired, fed-up and grissly, particularly since we had forgotten to take the address with us so could not, initially, find the place.

It's a large period house almost hidden behind an enormous hedge with no sign that it was a b and b outside but eventually we were directed there by some-one and since we could park directly outside, the impending argument about who should have brought directions was diverted. So, in we went, me not being exactly in the best of moods.

Peter Smith and Felicity outside the front door




But as soon as we walked in, the 'wow' factor kicked in. This was one hell of a beautiful house: an enormous hall, full of light, with windows and patio door at the far end, with views of the large garden (several acres in all) giving the impression of being in a large, beautiful decorated and furnished country home.

The hall




And our bedroom was absolutely gorgeous, as you can see from the picture below.

One of the bedrooms




What I particularly liked were the soothing colours, the shape of the room and windows, the chintzy curtains and the oh so comfortable bed with the softest of cotton sheets. And then there was the on-suite bathroom with everything you needed, all so clean and fresh and stylishly designed. And when John discovered that the full-length mirror opened up to shelving with such delights as nailpolish and footcream (a first for me anywhere we've stayed), then I was in seventh heaven.

The party was great, we had a marvellous nights sleep and a breakfast the next morning was sumptious. Plus, the two dogs resident dogs were as welcoming and friendly as the owners, Peter Smith and Felicity Wright.

Breakfast




They have links with Africa, so we were able to tell them about the Essaouira Festival and show some of John's recordings, which we delight in doing.

So, this was certainly money well spent and we'll certainly go back there. A 'find' is what you'd call it. Peter and Felicity chose the top of the range bed and breakfast market (the house was once a Millfield School boarding house) and I think they've done the house, which, apparently was very run-down, proud.

So, if you're looking for some-where to stay in Glastonbury, try Chindit House and get a taste of sheer luxury

Click here for more details:-
http://chindit-house.co.uk/pages/

P.S. Did I mention the basket of top quality chocolates? They got eaten pretty quickly. Well, we had just survived an enormous traffic jam and needed instant comfort!

REPORTING BACK ON THE ESSAOUIRA GNAWA AND WORLD MUSIC FESTIVAL 2009

Ishar and Abd Halim avec moi on the balcony of Restaurant Bab Laachour (which faces onto one of the venues - Moulay Hassan) on the Sunday evening, watching the final set - Hassan Boussou and Sewarye.
It was the kind of music you just had to dance to, which most of us on the balcony were doing when we weren't taking photos of each other. One of the great things about the festival is that total strangers are united by music.




Anyway, guys, I promised you that you'd be the first photos on this post and so here you are.


You'll also be popping up further down the post so keep reading.

Well, it's difficult to know where to start with the 2009 festival because for me, this year, the main event was nothing to do with the music, although I will, of course, be writing about that, because it was pretty bloody amazing, as usual. However, the thing that just blew me away and which I still can hardly believe is all to do with THE WIRE.

ROBERT (BOB) WISDOM - BUNNY IN THE WIRE

If you're new to my blog, then you need to know that I can't praise the American Drama Series THE WIRE highly enough. It's by far the best TV drama series I've ever seen. I have the box sets for all five seasons, watched them all once, and in the case of Season 4, twice, and intend to watch them all again soon.

Bob Wisdom




So, keep that in mind,(and if you're a regular reader of my blog, then you'll know just how special this is to me) when I tell you that I met and talked to the actor Bob Wisdom who played Bunny in THE WIRE.

If you're a devotee of THE WIRE, like me, then you'll know that Bunny was the police boss who, in Season 3, unofficially organised a drug buy/sell area in Baltimore where the police just let them get on with it, in an attempt (which was successful while it lasted) in keeping the lid on drug gang warfare.

And in Season 4, he was involved in trying to help the most disaffected students at High School. As was the way of things in Baltimore, the money ran out and the trial scheme was scrapped, but Bunny and his wife fostered one of the boys, Natham, which most certainly gave him new opportunities in life far removed from the drug scene.

And if you haven't watched THE WIRE, get the box sets and watch it !!!

Anyway, John had already told me that he thought he'd seen Bunny from THE WIRE and I was pretty miffed that I'd missed him. But on the way to the Moulay Hussan Square to watch Mahmoud Guinea start the festival off (after we'd taken our short cut round the side of the city walls which is far less congested than the main thoroughfares) we came onto one of the main streets which has a cafe right next to the short cut.

And sitting there, with a group of friends, was Bob Wisdom !!!

Bob Wisdom and Maggie



I had to do a double take and I called John back and whispered: 'I think that's Bunny from THE WIRE' and he said: 'Yes it is.'

Now, I wouldn't normally approach someone famous because I don't want to invade his/her privacy, but, for me, this was too special to ignore, given how much I love THE WIRE. So I did approach and say: 'Excusez-moi monsieur, but aren't you Bunny from THE WIRE?'

Maggie still talking to Bob Wisdom




And he was absolutely lovely. He stood up and said: 'Yes, I am,' and I said: 'Please can I shake your hand because THE WIRE is so fantastic.' And he shook my hand and was totally generous with his time and not only patient but also most charming as I raved about THE WIRE.

Apparently, he has been to the Essaouira Gnawa and World Music Festival for the last twelve years i.e. since it started, loves Gnawa music, plays the guembri (a special guitar central to the Gnawa sound) and jams with some of the Gnawa musicians.

He is such a lovely man with a generosity of spirit that you see in the character Bunny and I was just in awe, particularly when he kissed me on both cheeks before we went on our way.

So, now I'm not just a WIRE fan, but I'm also a Bob Wisdom fan. And I can hardly believe my luck in being able to talk to him.

I asked if John could take some photos and he said that was fine. John also took a small video of us which is published below. And to my delight, the web has picked up on his name and included some short videos of Bob Wisdom in THE WIRE and a WIRE video on safe sex, all of which you can view. I should have asked him what work he's doing now but I didn't want to intrude too much on his time. So, if you see a film or TV programme with Bob Wisdom in it, please post details on my blog.






P.S. If you google Bob Wisdom's name you'll come up with loads of sites with photographs of him, details of his extensive acting portfolio and clips from his work.

THE MUSIC

Okay, so this is why we were there in the first place. I was relieved to learn that the festival was going ahead because of the world economic crisis, but it was obvious that the festival had had to scale down its 'big names'. So there was no-one like Ki-many Marley, who I'm still raving about. But the music was still very, very good.

If you want to see and hear a little of the music from the festival, just click on the playlists below. As John adds new videos to YouTube, they will appear automatically in the playlist.



This was the last set, on the Sunday evening, at Moulay Hassan. The last set is always brilliant but tinged with sadness, too, because you know the festival is about to finish,

(One plus of the down scale was that our hotel didn't have its usual first night party on the terrace with the swimming pool, which meant no extra-loud disco music blaring out and peaceful days on the terrace with none of the frantic activity of putting up and then taking down all the scaffolding and equipment. Although John and I did have a lot of fun last year watching them trying to glue down carpets.)

However, despite the scaling down, there were still nine venues for the four days of the festival, most of them outdoors, and all of them free. Plus, there were over fifty groups and individual musicians playing a wide range of music and coming from not just Morocco but all over the world.

Because of our fantastic position on our balcony, over-looking Bab Marrakesh, we watched all of the sets that were playing there. Thus we missed some acts we would have liked to have seen at Moulay Hassan, like Arrested Development, Donald Harrison and Congo Nation, all from America.

Anyway, the best, in my opinion, at Bab Marrakesh were:-

Maalem Mahmoud Guinea, Afoxi Loni and Martin Vassilev

It was great to see Mahmoud still playing so brilliantly and I spotted both his eldest son and Hussein, his apprentice, amongst the group. And they also had a young boy dancing with them: all three a welcome reminder that the Gnawa tradition is being taught to the next generation.

Blue Mogador - a young gnawa/fusion group from Essaouira, who were fantastic and had me out of my chair and dancing wildly, always a good indicator that I enjoy the music.

Hamid El Kasri & Khaled & Karim Ziad & WDR (an orchestra from Germany with a really big sound). I was absolutely bowled over last year by Hamid El Kasri (I wrote about this in my report from last year's festival) so I was really looking forward to seeing him this year.

However, although this year he and his accompanying performers were excellent, he didn't play the obviously popular songs, like Chalaba, as he did last year and so there was less audience participation. Last year he was A * plus; this year, I felt that the big band sound detracted from his own unique Gnawa sound.

Rais Brahim Assili - a Berber singer with his own group and the A*+ this year for me. I'm really looking forward to hearing this music again when John does his time-consuming editing of his tapes.

When I look at the programme, I realise how much I actually missed, so apologies to all those musicians I didn't manage to see. But I still maintain that the Western world is missing something really special by the lack of coverage of Gnawa and World music and am very thankful that I have been able to go so many of the festivals and hope to do so next year, God Willing.

ALEXANDRA RICHARDSON

Alexandra is a young music student who wants to write a paper on Gnawa music, particularly its fusion with other genres and the separation from the spiritual aspects of Gnawa. And so she contacted John i.e. daftnotstupid because she was going to be at the festival and wanted to meet up, which the three of us did at Chez Mustapha, our favourite cafe, close to Moulay Hassan Square.

So, after we had told her what we knew about Gnawa music, John asked the owner of the cafe, Hisham, if he knew any Gnawa musicians whom she could interview and by a stroke of good luck, Hisham came back shortly afterwards to tell us that there was a Gnawa musician sitting at one of the other tables, he introduced us and Alexandra got her interview there and then.

The musician in question was a young man from Essaouira called Yassine El Kanri who leads a Gnawa/fusion group called Ganga Fusion. This was all done in French, which was interesting to say the least, but I'm glad that Alexandra was able to make a start.

John and Yassine




John and Yassine




Alexandra and Yassine




Alexandra and Yassine




It's good to know that some-one intends to research Gnawa music and I hope you achieve your mission, Alexandra. Let us know how you get on.

P.S. Have listened to a track played by Ganga Fusion on their website and I'd like to hear more. There are eight players in the group and a variety of tradional and modern instruments. Definitely a group I'd like to see perform.

LOTS OF PHOTOGRAPHS HERE TO GIVE A FLAVOUR OF THE FESTIVAL AND ESSAOUIRA




Hisham, one of the waiters from the restaurant, and me on the terrace of Hotel Blue. It was Hisham who told me on the Friday morning about the death of Michael Jackson, which was a big shock. No matter how mixed up his personal life was, he was a brilliant performer. Apparently, the audience at Moulay Hassan were informed at the end of the Thursday night sets; proof, if proof were needed, that bad news travels fast.




Hisham and Rachid who look after all of us on the terrace of Hotel Blue plus me.


Ishaq and Abd Halim looking suitably cool on the terrace of Bab Laachour.




Youssef, Youssef, Mohammed and Rachid plus me in the foyer of Hotel Blue.If you look carefully, you will see the chocolate remnants of the Magnum I had just eaten. I have, apparently, no shame. These guys, by the way, do their very best to keep me out of trouble. In fact, all the staff at Hotel Blue are highly professional and very friendly. It's always a pleasure to meet up with them each year.




Stephane and Epoise on the terrace of Bab Laachour. We got chatting to this charming French couple who were on the next table to us at Bab Laachour on the Sunday evening. I hope things are going well for them.




The final set at Moulay Hassan on the Sunday.




Turn your gaze to the right of the Moulay Hassan Square (from the Bab Laachour terrace)and there's the Atlantic Sea. It's a glorious sight, wild, rough and untamed.




Blue Mogador playing at Bab Marrakesh, taken from our famous balcony. (See last year's post on the festival to get the full story).




My favourite place and activity in the afternoon on the Terrace of Hotel Blue. This alien spaceship-shaped lounger, plus a similiar one, were new this year and became 'mine' for the holiday, thanks to Hisham. By the way, Hisham, I got a comment on this post from someone from America who recognised you. Apparently he/she went to school with you. Sadly, no name or address was left. Still, you're becoming quite a celebrity. (My friends think you're gorgeous).





The audience slowly building up at Bab Marrakesh, taken from our balcony.





GULLIVER TRAVELS - ONE HECK OF A LUCKY TEDDY BEAR

I bought this teddybear, Gulliver, on the flight over with Easy Jet, who are giving two free tickets each month to the person who sends in the best photograph of Gulliver in some exotic locations. So, I took loads of photos of Gulliver in different locations and here are just a few of them. Not sure which one I'll send in. I reckon that if I send one photo a month then I may just win those tickets and then we can go back to Morocco - Yeah !!!

How I pursuaded Mamadoo to pose with Gulliver on the steps leading up to Hotel Blue I'll never know. Shows just what a good sport he is.



Gulliver filming on the balcony




Lunch on the Hotel Blue terrace. Like most bears, Gulliver enjoys the occasional glass of wine with that sharp, salty taste of olives, with accompanying freshly made bread.




Gulliver managed to sneak up onto the empty stage at Moulay Hassan having sweet-talked his way past two 'security guards'. This bear certainly knows how to get around.

EXETER WRITERS SHORT STORY COMPETITION

Cor Blimey, I've just returned from Morocco, read my e-mails and discovered that my short story The Dog in the Pram was one of the runners-up. I know how stiff the competition is that I'm up against so I'm well chuffed. That's another plus I can include in my introductory letter to the NEXT set of agents I write off to. Well,every little helps.

ESSAOUIRA GNAOUA AND WORLD MUSIC FESTIVAL 2009 (MOROCCO)

Yes, it's this time of the year again, and yes, we are fortunate enough to be able to attend, and yes, I've got my bag ready (John will, of course, pack his just before we set off) and yes, I'm ready to go.

Details of performers and venues have only just been released so we've been carefully scrutinizing them. This year, there seems to be more of an emphasis on Gnaoua groups, with foreign guest troupes and musicians accompanying them and no big name performers, but already I've spotted some of my favourite Gnaoua groups. Plus, it means lots of fusion, which I adore.

The festival starts next Thursday and finishes on the Sunday and yet again, it's all free. There are nine open-air venues in total, which is pretty amazing.

The main venue is the large square - Moulay Hassan - just within the city walls and next to the sea, so it has a stunning backdrop. The first act to start off the Festival here is Maleem Mahmoud Guinea, playing with Groupe Afoxe Loni. We went to Mahmoud's house a few Xmases ago to attend his lila session (you can read about it on the daftnotstupid blog) and I'm fascinated to see whether his two gifted sons will be part of the group.

The other large venue is the even larger square - Bab Marrakech -right outside our hotel and I'm delighted to say that the closing act here on the Saturday night is Hamid El Kasri, who so wowed the crowd and sent me into a state of joyous delirium when he performed last year (which you can read about on an earlier post of mine), playing with WRD and Karim Ziad.

That one starts at midnight so I'm going to be shattered the next day, particularity as I will be dancing an awful lot - but who cares. It'll be very, very cold on our balcony so I'll probably be wearing all my clothes on top of each other - but who cares.

The Festival organizers give details, in French, of most of the musicians and so John used Google to translate into English, with hilarious results. Here's a little taster:-

Khaled ....In 1996 he recorded the album 'Sahara' in collaboration with Jean-Jacques Goldman. This collaboration will give birth to 'Aicha', the largest cardboard sung in French. Thanks to Khaled, rai was a refreshing customs, inspiration and renewal of the sensitive form.

Babani Kone did his apprenticeship with his grandmother Awa Kone, famous cherry which she learned the gestures and vocal intonations.

Meddy Gerville plays from the start with the musical's most popular island.

And so on and so on. Trouble is, if this is how Google translates in such a haphazard way, what do the translations for my posts read like in foreign languages? I dread to think but hopefully, it'll give people a laugh.

READ ALL ABOUT IT HERE IN A FEW WEEKS TIME.

PUBLICATION - YEAH !!!

Okay, so it's not my novel or another short story, but publication of a Letter to the Editor in a national newspaper (The Guardian) is pretty darn good.

Before my sixtieth birthday in March, I half joked about doing something outrageous like liposuction on my wine and chocolate bulge, plus a tasteful little tattoo on my arm or the base of my spine.

Both John and Lou were horrified by these suggestions, though, and in truth, I had decided that I couldn't be bothered doing either. However, an article in last Saturday's Guardian Week-end colour magazine re-enforced the surgery decision most conclusively.

Because there was a long section in the magazine, entitled 'The Price of Beauty,' about plastic surgery, which was accompanied by the most gruesome photographs of the realities of plastic surgery, particularly the one showing an operation for a tummy tuck, which looked like a cow being hacked into pieces.

So, I wrote a brief letter to The Guardian about this. And okay, I had been thinking of having liposuction rather than a tummy tuck and I've already started losing weight by eating less fat, but the opportunity was too good to miss.

So, you can imagine my delight when I saw, this morning, that my letter had been printed on the letters to the editor page of today's Guardian colour mag.

So, I can now say that I've already been published in 2009!

Well, you have to grasp at straws in the publishing industry.

Lou has been telling her friends about the letter under the general heading of: "My mum's so middle class!"

By the way, I've had another rejection from an agent, this time from Creative Authors, and yes, they kept the paper clip.

THE PROCESS OF WRITING A NOVEL - THE MAGGIE KNUTSON WAY

There are no rules on how to prepare for writing a novel and I steer clear of books advising the sure-fire way of writing a best seller, because, sadly, there isn't a sure-fire way. In fact, there are so many how-to books and magazines about writing that you can spend all your time reading them and not actually writing a thing.

I subscribe to only two magazines: Mslexia, which I can't praise highly enough. It comes out quarterly so I can usually manage to read it all before the next issue; and Writing Magazine, which comes out monthly. I personally don't think it's as good as Mslexia but it's a good standby until I receive my next Mslexia copy.

Now that I'm not teaching (hurrah!), I have time to structure my day as I wish. I tend to write in the morning and evening, so I'm free during the afternoon to harness Archie up into the back of the car, drive to River Park Leisure Centre for a swim, have a snack lunch as I'm changing (home-made fruit smoothies are my favourite), put a fair amount of slap on, chat to every-one and any-one, take the short drive to one of my favourite pubs for a coffee and fag (usually The Black Boy which has a sun-trap of an enclosed garden) and then walk the dog along the Water Meadows. And it's whilst I'm having my coffee etc, that I read my writing magazines.

It's a great way to spend a day and I'm so thankful that I can do it. I don't think I've yet recovered from the stress and strain of teaching but I'm getting there.

For my first novel - Cyprus Blues - I did detailed character studies for my four main characters - Kate, Ellie, Tony and Jack - but didn't bother with the rest.

However, inspired by the television American dramas 'The Wire', 'Homicide' and 'The Corner', where all characters, even if they play only a minor role, are wonderfully rounded and life-like, I am now doing mini- character studies of all my minor characters, as well as the more detailed ones of the main players in Winchester Blues.

And in the process of doing this, I'm getting so many ideas for how I write the novel that I think that it's time well spent, particularly as I plan to to write more detective novels set in Winchester with many of the characters introduced in this first of the (hopefully) series.

In fact, by really thinking about all characters, how they look, their personalities, their strengths and weaknesses, their personal situations and so on, I feel that the book will more or less write itself, based on these character studies.

The temptation, of course, is to try and put too much detail in so these studies are mainly for my benefit in understanding my characters and what they will do and how they will react.

What works for me, is basing my characters on combinations of people I know, being careful not to make the character too closely like the person. It's more of a rough guide for me, really.

The general advice is not to try to totally recreate someone you know because it can limit your writing and I normally agree with this.

However, the one exception in Winchester Blues is Frances Charlton, one of the deputy-heads, and I do this unashamedly because she was a real person - my mum, Frances Charlton, who was a real deputy-head and the best there was. When thinking of creating this deputy-head character, I just couldn't get round my mum, who was better than any-one I could actually make up. Her personality and teaching style were so perfect for what I wanted that it seemed ridiculous not to use her.

I guess, in a way, it's a tribute to her and because she really was exceptional at her job, I decided to use her real name.

She's not around to object but I think she'd be pleased with her portrayal. And anyway, the delicious thing about 'rules' is that you don't always have to stick to them.

I was having difficulty with three of my characters, though:

I just couldn't picture Diane and Christine, two of the three secretaries, until I realised that I was seeing them as being very similiar. So when I envisaged them looking very different and with different personalities, ages and backgrounds, then they became real to me and I could see that they could have an ongoing story within the novel, even though it will only be a small part.

and

The second deputy-head, Tom Patterson, was also giving me problems. I just couldn't picture him in my mind although I knew what his personality and role in the novel was going to be. And then, a week ago, whilst walking Archie, I saw this guy with two kids on bikes and he looked so distinctive that I slowed down to take a better look, hopefully not looking too obvious.

He was tanned, with short hair and that authoritative way of walking that soldiers often have and immediately I could envisage Tom. He will look slightly different but I'm making him ex-army and that will make even more sense of his personality. This guy was really quite dishy in an understated way (as opposed, for example, to the obvious good looks of some-one like Brad Pitt) and that's just how I want Tom to be like.

And finally, in this brief insight into Maggie Knutson's approach to writing, I want to mention another piece of general advice given to writers, which is that there should be nothing in your novel that does not move the plot forward or is not actually relevant to the plot. However, inspired by David Simon, ( the creator of 'The Wire', 'The Corner' and 'Homicide'), I'm more inclined now to introduce small story-lines that aren't crucial the plot but crucial to character development.

Several episodes, for example, in the first season of 'Homicide' are almost exclusively building up character and nothing much happens but because of these episodes, when something important happens, you understand where they're coming from in terms of their actions and reactions. And it means that you see them firstly as individual people and then as detectives. Thus, less chance of creating stereotypes.

If I can achieve just a fraction of what David Simon achieves, then I shall be well pleased. To me, he is an absolute genius and would-be writers would do well to watch his work and absorb his meticulous methods of creating and presenting a story.

FOILED AGAIN !!!

With renewed confidence with the shorter introductory letter and new opening of Cyprus Blues, I sent the first three chapters to two new agencies, found in The Writers' and Artists' Yearbook 2009, having first checked on their websites that they were still considering new writers.

So it was with dismay that by return of post, my manuscript came back from Rupert Crew Limited, telling me that they had closed their books.

Why didn't they have this information on their website? It is costly sending off manuscripts and time wasting if websites are not up to date.

In future, I shall actually phone up an agency first and not rely on their websites.

But at least they didn't keep the paper clip.

CRAZY OR WHAT?

Like everyone else, I waited in the LONG, SLOW queue at Winchester's main post-office today: to send off a short story and sample chapters of Cyprus Blues and I also wanted the new pamphlet of the revised postage prices.

BUT they didn't have any. Apparently, they were allocated 30, which went in half-an-hour, and staff were advised to tell customers to get the details online. So they have a product but won't give easily accessible details of price.

CRAZY OR WHAT?

Don't they want to have a business?

Whoever's bright idea this was should be sacked without a whacking great pay-off.

I'm getting impatient with management inefficiency and government incompetence.

WE NEED A THRIVING POST OFFICE IN THIS COUNTRY !!!

POLLY AND THE BILLETS DOUX

On Monday, Polly and the Billets Doux released their first ever single - Follow My Feet! - taken from their impending CD - Fiction, Half-Truths and Downright lies.

And to mark the occasion, they played a live gig at the HMV store in Winchester. I had forgotten just how good this band is. The acoustics in the place were not brilliant but the group sounded pretty damn good. Polly has just the most beautiful voice and she's a born performer. A delight to listen to.

John videoed the performance, which you can find here



And I took some photos from my coveted position leaning against the counter, as close to the door as I could get. It wasn't a great place to take photos from and I can't yet download them because I can't read the written instructions John wrote down for me (I am such a computer illiterate.) But I'll add them here once I've 'mastered' this complicated procedure. NOW DONE !

Those of us who waited patiently for the group to set up, which was at least half-an-hour, had to contend with people popping in at the last minute and standing right in front of us and thus blocking the exit. So there was a constant battle to move them, by the staff, because of health and safety regulations.

And, of course, I made my feelings known too: "I've been standing here for over half an hour to get a good view and you try and plonk yourself right in front of me," sort of thing and I wasn't taking "fuck you" for an answer.

Lots of copies of the single were sold and rumour has it that Taylor Swift, the American musician making a name for herself in the music industry, popped in to have a look-see-listen.

So, ALL IN ALL AN EXCITING AFTERNOON.

LOU AND THE WIRE

Lou was home for a few days last week. On Wednesday evening we all watched the 1st and 2nd episodes of Season One of The Wire. She then watched episode three on her computer and, the next day, took the rest of Season One plus all of Season Two.

By 1.30am this morning, she had finished the whole lot!

"I watched it back to back," she confessed. "It just gets so addictive."

Exactly.

THE WIRE FATIGUE? NEVER !!!

Lou has come to visit for a few days and while we walking Archie (dog) by The Water Meadows, I gave Lou a very brief run down of The Wire because we were going to watch the very first episode of Season One in the evening, just to see if she liked it.

And she did.

So, we then watched episode two and she definitely wants to take the box set home with her, which is a pig because it was brilliant watching the first two episodes again and seeing how clever the whole production over five seasons is...it's truely awesome.

And Lou found it very easy to follow, unlike me the first time, so it just goes to show what a dim-wit I am. However, in my defense, Lou did actually study television at university, whereas I didn't! I'm learning about it watching The Wire (over and over again). And loving every minute of it. It's given me so many ideas for my own writing that I'm terming the whole watching The Wire thing as educational.

And Lou is under strict instructions to finish the box set as soon as possible, so John and I can watch all of Season One again - for educational purposes...

POSSIBLY MY LAST POST ABOUT THE WIRE BUT I DOUBT IT !!!

I tell you with a heavy heart that I watched the VERY LAST episode of The Wire on Friday (Good Friday). I had been putting it off as long as I could because I didn't want to finish it but my burning desire to know what happened, hoping so much that Marlo would get his come-comeuppance, triumphed.

This was Season Five and, for me, the least successful of the seasons because:-

* I knew this was the very last season and I guess I was hoping for some happy endings - as if !!!

* I was very uncomfortable with the main plot concerning Jimmy McNulty and Lester - it just felt all wrong and I knew that everything would unravel but again, I so wanted good to triumph over evil and this is The Wire, after all. There are some personal triumphs but overall the ending is bleak

* Instead of 13 episodes, there were only 10 so it was, perhaps, a little compressed

However, don't think that I shan't watch it again because I shall! Only next time, I'll pick up quite a lot of what just flew past me on Friday and at least I won't have all that happy-end expectation.

The Wire still is, in my opinion, the best TV I've ever seen and it's going to be a very hard act to follow. I've ordered the box sets of The Corner and the drama set in Iraq, both HBO productions, and it shall be very interesting to see what Martin Scorsese produces for HBO. But at the moment I've got The Wire fatigue and I need to watch something like Mamma Mia just for some light relief. But there's no way that I'm going to watch The First Lady Detective on BBC because it's just too twee.

I REMEMBER TAPES live at The Railway Inn Thursday 16th April

The Winchester Indie/Rock group, I Remember Tapes, are playing at The Railway Inn, Winchester, on Thursday 16th April.

This is to debut their new CD and tickets cost a mere £4 or £3 with a flier.

The daftnotstupid team were hoping to record this performance but are unable to do so because of prior commitments.

The lead singer, Tom, is my hairdresser at The New Midas Hair, Tanning and Beauty Salon so I hope the evening is a great hit.

If you manage to get to the gig and want to write about it, leave a message on this blog.

All the best, Tom.

Check:
the I Remember Tapes website
the New Midas website

AMSTERDAM APRIL 2nd - 4th 2009

Meet 'Claire' or was it 'Sheila' or 'Olga' or 'Heidi'? It's difficult to remember names when you're nearing the dreg ends of a bottle of rose wine.

Whatever her name, she certainly needs serious make-up lessons.

I've decided that I'm going to call 'her' 'Vicky Pollard in a good mood'.

Vicky was out with 'her' dad, soon to be dad-in-law, plus friends, on a special 'hen night' and if they all managed to return home to Nottingham in one piece, the wedding is in a couple of weeks time. So, good luck for that and guys, if you can send me a wedding photo, I'll attempt to put it on this blog. But please give Vicky a make-up session beforehand!

This, by the way, is Amsterdam and a very fine city it is too with its myriad of canals, over 1000 bridges (which makes it hellish difficult if you get lost), fascinating tall houses lining the canals and a joie de vie which makes it a very fun city.

This was my birthday present: three nights in Amsterdam and John and I had an absolute ball.

FIRST MORNING/AFTERNOON

We got up at 4.30 (!) on Thursday morning for a 6.50 Flybe flight from Southampton Aiport, which has to be one of the most user friendly airport in the country.

And after we had arrived at our hotel and left our bags (it was too early to actually check in) we hit the city running, so to speak. Things just kept happening!

* went to our favourite hat shop, The English Hatter, and bought a panama hat for me (for Morocco). I've already got a selection of their stetsons.

* had coffee at a smashing canal-side cafe - Kafe Kaldi - which serves excellent coffee (and hot chocolate with cream), cookies to die for, incredible loose coffee which is a delight to sniff even before drinking, an array of coffee machines, special heat-resistant mugs and glasses (I'm already hooked on the ones we bought), and a wide choice of tea-pots and coffee pot. We already have quite a range of their goods in our kitchen from previous visits and now have even more!

John sitting outside Kafe Kaldi



* I then left John to his own devices and walked (about 20 mins) to the local Leisure Centre for a swim. It's been revamped since I was last there and it's a swimmers paradise - two pools with lots of lane swimming (one pool and obviously my favourite, has beautifully warm water and a jacuzzi-effect blast of water coming out of one of the walls) and not a whiff of chlorine. The water is disinfected with the latest technology, the name of which I cannot remember...yes, I can - ozone treatment. You can tell the difference - it's much, much better than chlorine, which stinks and stings!

* Walked back to meet John outside our designated meeting point (a bakery) and promptly twisted my ankle on the awkward pavement (most of the pavements in Amsterdam are narrow and awkward) because a bicycle was propped up against a wall.


Work in progress so don't expect total accuracy or photos where a photo should be.


The bakery, me and the offending bicycle.

Now this does bring me onto my main criticism of Amsterdam: there are too many bl...y bikes. It's a bicycle nightmare. They come at you from every which way and you have to be focused all the time because they don't take prisoners. This does, of course, mean that most people look very fit and tanned, and it's certainly the best way to travel as well as eco-friendly but it's really nerve-wracking for pedestrians. We are definitely at the bottom of the pecking order in Amsterdam.

* Limped along to the hole-in-the-wall chip shop with John to buy chips with mayonnaise. (I'm telling you guys, the Dutch certainly know how to cook chips.)

* Limped to one of the squares to eat our lunch on a bench. As we ate, we talked:

Me: If I sat here all afternoon and shot at passing cyclists, how many do you think I'd get?
John: Not enough

Me: How many benches do you reckon there are in Amsterdam?
John: Not enough

THE ACCIDENT IN THE TAXI

* Decided we needed to go to a supermarket for essentials like water, chocolate, wine and an anti-inflammatory gel for my ankle. So, because I was finding walking difficult, we found a taxi at a taxi rank, got in and were talking to driver about our destination, when we all felt a strong push moving us backwards. The car parked (illegally) in front of us had reversed into us and the driver was trying to drive away.

Our driver got out of the taxi and there then followed a heated discussion, the car driver denying what he had done, and eventually he just shrugged his shoulders and drove off without giving any details and leaving our taxi with dents at the front. And since it was a very smart Mercedes taxi, it was obviously going to cost a lot to fix. John and I know this only too well, both having old Mercedes. Fabulous cars to drive and admire but hellish expensive to repair.

So, we got to the supermarket through heavy traffic, bought our goodies and then all three of us set off to the Police Station so our driver could report the incident and use us as witnesses. John and I sat in the taxi, enjoying the opportunity of watching Amsterdam life from a stationery position, whilst the taxi driver went inside. Eventually, policeman Bruce came out with our driver and took a statement. Bruce is very young, very charming and fluent in English. So all in all quite a fascinating time.

Our driver then returned us to our hotel and it was only then that we checked in and went to our room to unpack!

Just to finish off this story, our taxi driver, Reda, brought us another form to fill in the next day for his insurance company and it would seem that they will cover the cost of the repairs. And when we left Amsterdam on Saturday, Reda took us to the airport, so I really think it was a case of "All's well that ends well." Plus, the long sit in the taxi rested my ankle wonderfully and it was fine the next day.



This is where the incident took place

THE HOTEL



* Paulo and me outside Hotel Hegra

Our hotel was just what we needed - small, inexpensive, clean and welcoming, set on a canal and central to the city. I can thoroughly recommend it, despite the incredibly steep and narrow stairs, which all these old houses have and which makes setting off from and returning to the room an adventure in itself.

Paulo was one of the guys working there and it was fun to take some photos together. Paulo is a ballet dancer by profession, as you can see in the next photo, where we took up our ballet positions, and very friendly, like most of the Dutch people we met.

Check out the Hotel Hegra on its website:- http://www.hotelhegra.nl/index.htm



And so our brief stay in Amsterdam progressed at a similar pace. We certainly hadn't come for a rest and yet, strangely, now I'm home I feel invigorated. But I haven't quite finished with my report because there are a few places that I want to mention because they're worth looking up if you ever go to Amsterdam. (And no, no-one is giving me commission to show-case these places!)

LALOLI

This is a jewellery shop that John discovered a few years ago. It's run by two sisters who make most of the jewellery and it's really funky, funny stuff. Below is a photograph of me wearing the tulip broach and circular ear-rings which we bought this trip and below that is a photo of one of the sisters, Sandra, and me outside the shop.





I also have a collection of really cute animal badges bought over several years from the shop and at some stage I'll photograph them and put the pictures on this post so you can see how cute they are. And here they now are:-



penguin



giraffe



tortoise



frog



tulip



all purchases are individually presented in attractive gift boxes

Visit the Laloli website at:
http://www.nlstreets.nl/EN/shop/atelier-laloli--art-amsterdam/

LUDEN RESTAURANT AND BRASSERIE



It was having supper here on Friday night that we spotted and 'shot' Vicky and friends and I include this restaurant because the food was excellent and we had a lovely chat with one of the waitresses who, we discovered, is Moroccan and loves Gnaoua music. John played her one of his recordings on his i-pod and the whole thing was just very special. Any reminder of Morocco rates highly for us. She left before I could get her name but she knows who she is and I wish her well.
htt
Check their menu at:

ZEPPOS RESTAURANT



Outside Zeppos Restaurant with the waitress, Claire.


We happened upon this restaurant, down a little street, and had a superb lunch. I had a Croque Madame, which is, basically, cheese on toast with a fried egg on top but very tasty all the same. It was very peaceful sitting away from all the hustle and noise so that's why I'm recommending it, plus the quality of the food and the service.

Check their website: http://www.10best.com/Amsterdam,Netherlands/Restaurants/French/97565/Kapitein_Zeppos_Amsterdam/

THE STAMP SHOP



This fascinating shop sells everything you need for stamping (i.e. creative work). I bought a couple of stamps and a colour pad here well over ten years ago and still use them - their condition is still pretty good. And now I've got some more!

THE COFFEE SHOP



If you want a cup of coffee in Amsterdam, don't go to a coffee shop or you'll get a big surprise. Coffee shops are for selling cannabis, which is legal in Holland. This shop is one of many. But don't try lighting up an ordinary fag inside because that's illegal!?

THE PEDESTRIAN AREA



There are lots of shops here and no cyclists but crowds of people so you can't walk at your own pace. I much prefer walking by the canals where there are an abundance of small, interesting shops and beautiful architecture to enjoy...it would be perfect if it wasn't for those darn cyclists. (And like many British cyclists, they ride down the wrong way on one way streets, jump traffic lights and ride on pavements, too)



And finally, the CANAL TRIP. All these photos were taken on our one hour trip, which really is a must for any visitors to Amsterdam. What made this trip so special was that the driver cradled one of his 'customers', a fractious baby, in his arms towards the end of the trip and sounded the hooter several times, which fascinated the baby into silence. Sadly, I don't have a photo of that but these are pretty good and give you a flavour of canal life in Amsterdam.
















By the way, did I mention that the weather was glorious? Well, it was, as you can see from the last photograph. The Thursday and Friday were beautifully sunny and warm and Amsterdam, which, apparently, had had dull, cloudy and cold weather for most of the year, just blossomed, with people sitting outside enjoying the sun. Sheer bliss!